Sunday, January 11, 2009

posting

Well, that's just over a week of 'blogging' and I have to say that even this short post format output has been quite hard. [And several/most/all of my posts consist of little more than quotes and/or drawings with one or two words from me.]
The difficulty comes from not knowing exactly what I want to do with the blog and from a self consciousness that descends every time I want to post something (to try and escape that this time I drafted this post on a post-it note - several post it notes, actually). There are two main results arising from the self consciousness:
1) I sound very pretentious (maybe its that I am very pretentious). This is best illustrated in the post on economics - going for pithy insight I spout incomprehensible twaddle. See also my film posts, though I like them better.
2) Nothing is expressed very clearly. It is only now sinking in that I need to think about what I write before I post it.
That said, I like blogging (the process of putting something up), having a place to store things I have made or like, a diary, a journal, a record, media center, whatever I might want it to be or become. It would be nice to be less self conscious about it all. Maybe even to reach the point where I tell other people that this exists.
I want to have some original thoughts (is this sounding pretentious again?) and to write about drawing and baking (or at least post pictures and photos), link to films and things that move me and make me think, that give me hope, to write some personal theology (isn't all theology ultimately personal?).
Right now I want to get better at this, the drawing and the baking, not to mention the relating, loving, befirending, contributing, etc.
Phew.
So, here's a picture of two loaves of bread. These are among the first, from June, 2008 (we have not bought bread since then).
It's beautiful; made by me collaborating with time, yeast, Ed Espe Brown's recipe, the sustained world and its maker.

3 comments:

Vajra said...

Blogging is quite difficult. Unlike a journal, it is public and therefore the censor is always rearing its ugly head, and has to be silenced. (Can't help thinking about Sarah Palin at his point.) I found that if I just kept at it, it got, if not easier, at least more routine.

Welcome. Price of Admission: Your mind.

Derek said...

Vajra,
Thanks so much for the comment and encouragement. I am curious as to how you found your way here...
Off to take a look at your blogs and will comment there...
best,
Derek

Vajra said...

I noticed that someone whose blog I found while reading comments on a friend's blog (this is sounding more complicated than it is) listed "Wings of Desire" as one of her favorite films. It's one of my favorites as well, so I decided to do a search on Blogger for other people who also listed it as a fave. Your profile caught me up the rest you know.